Solus – 1: My Name Is…

(Hello.  Every year, there is this thing called National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) where writers from the across the world attempt to write a 50,000 word novel in just 30 days.  For my second year of trying to do this, I’ve decided to share each chapter as it’s completed.  In other words, anyone in the world can read my rough draft as it is written.  It’s a little unorthodox and possibly a terrible idea, but I’m excited about it.  Thanks for checking it out.  The novel is called Solus, and that’s all I’m going to tell you.)

[Paul’s Log: Day 693]

Hello, my name is Paul, and this is my data-log.  Wait, that’s not very exciting.  I should have planned this better.  Can I try again?

Computer, start over.  Delete what I said before.   I said delete it.  Stop transcribing everything that I’m saying.  How do I stop this thing?  Is it this button? I think it’s this bu…

[End Log]

[Paul’s Log: Day 693 – 2]

Are we back?  We are.  After pushing each available button and speaking in a loud, angry voice, it seems that anything I say here is here to stay.  With that in mind, I’ll try to be more prepared for my intros.

I will also not punch the computer in the future.  My knuckles are causing me pain, and I’ll probably have to visit Stanis and Juliana in medical.  Again.

Then I’ll tell them I punched my computer because it was being disagreeable, and they’ll tell me that I was the one being disagreeable, and they’ll be right.

Again.

As I said, my name is Paul.  Do I need to say my name?  It says my name right on the screen there.  Anyway, I guess I’m long overdue on starting this.  Everyone else, as far as I know, has kept regular with their data logs for nearly two years.  I was just never sure what to say.

I’m still not sure what to say.  Or what the point of this is.

To entertain myself?  To glorify my life?  That sounds like vanity, and from what our lessons have taught us, that was a serious problem Earth of the Past.  Maybe that means someone else will read this.

But is there anyone else out there to read this?

Everyone here knows what I’m going to say.  We don’t really have secrets.  Especially me.  Who would I tell them to?  And what would be their purpose?

The only secrets here are the ones that none of us know the answers to.   The mysteries of what came before.  There are so many things we don’t know.  So much information we weren’t told.  Was this deemed unimportant?  Or is it simply a secret?  And who is keeping it?

I’m talking in circles.  I do that a lot.  Far more than anyone else here.  Maybe I should talk about my day instead. Bram and Sara said that they just tell talk about the whole day before they go to bed.

“Every day is a story,” Bram said to me.

“And stories should be told,” Sarah added.

They’re always finishing each other’s thoughts like that.  We don’t have many stories here.  It sounds like there are many on Earth of the Past.   Maybe that’s the point of these logs.  To make our own stories. Then Bram and Sara are on the right path.

So here’s the story of today.  Why anyone would care of that, I do not know.

I woke up in my bed.  Alone, of course.  I cleaned my teeth.  Did some stretches and went running.  Then I picked a new word for the week.  It’s this thing I’ve been doing for over a year now.  A new word every week. Makes me feel more useful and gives me something to talk about.

The word was cantankerous.  It means bad tempered and uncooperative.  I think when I punched the computer, I was being cantankerous.

Next, I went down to the cafeteria for breakfast.  I was the last one there, and all the tables people were sitting at were full.  This happens more than I’d like it to.  Thankfully Nova and Stellar have picked up on this.  Shortly after my arrival, they quickly moved to a new table so I could join them.

I like everyone here in different ways, but I like them the most.  Nova is just so relatable and relaxed.   And Stellar….she’s….beautiful.  And nice.  And the way her brown hair bounces and flows as she talks….Nova is very fortunate to be paired with her.

I see the way they look at each other and smile at each other and make each other better, and sometimes, it is difficult to be around them.  Like today.

In fact, all I could really think about the rest of the day as I repaired and checked the robots’ progress on the education building was them.  I wondered why they hadn’t made things official and chosen a second name.  And then I thought about Stellar’s smile.  Nova always make her smile.  I’d like to make someone smile.

I do, I suppose.  Even today, I made this joke to Tiberius, and he just…

But it’s not the same.  Nothing is really the same for me as it is for everyone else.

One of my first words of week, it was Latin, some language that “died” very long ago, and yet, people kept using it.  I don’t really understand that, but then again, there are many things I don’t understand about the old world.

The word was “solus”, which means alone or unaccompanied.  And that is I.  Paul.  One of 31 settlers on Providence: Earth of the Present.  And I am the only one who is unaccompanied.

I am Solus.

And why that is…I…I am not sure.

[end log]

Click here to continue to chapter 2 —->

(And that’s all we have for now.  Come back soon for part 2!  In the meantime, feel free to share thoughts, feelings, questions, and music recommendations in the comments below.)

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Timothy Snyder

Hello. I am a Minneapolis-based writer and the creator of This Blank Page. If I'm not working or writing, I'm probably at a concert, sitting in a local coffee shop, sweating at the gym, playing video games, or hanging with my dog Falkor. My life's goal is to one day have my own Wikipedia page.

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